This goes with the "ANY" key

[rrich]

Back in the day...

I would always attend WesCon (The Western Connector Show) at the Anaheim Convention center. (There was a lot more than just connectors.) Every vendor was giving out some sort of useless sample of their wares. There was this outfit that made plastic key tops. (e.g.The things that you are pounding on right now.) I searched through the pile and found one that said "CE". Typically used for a calculator and would Clear the current Entry.

Fast forward. I was working for "digital" at the time. We had a PDP-11/70 system in our fishbowl as a demo system and was used to submit orders to Maynard from the western region. I got some double sided tape and attached the CE key to the console in a very official position. This key was knows as the "Call the Engineer" key on our system. Everyone thought it was funny even the Field Service Engineers thought so.

So several months later, we had a delegation from Japan that were considering purchasing one of our systems. I saw three of them in the fish bowl looking and pointing at the "CE" button. I rush into the fish bowl and explain the joke. The member of the delegation that understands English explains to the other two. All three are giggling and the salesman come in. When he hears what is going on, he is really irritated with me. He even complains to his boss. (His boss basically told him to put a sock in it.)

Three or four days later the salesman comes into my cube asking if I have another "CE" key. I'm a bit confused and ask why. It seems that the Japanese won't buy a system unless it also has a "CE" key. The Field Engineer that had to install the system was also asked ot install the "CE" key. He told me later that he thought thast it was hysterical.

[rrich]

There was a "digital" operating system called RSX-11. It was a real time system that when I was at TRW Credit (Now Experian) we implemented a reliable replacement for an ancient version of a 3270 terminal controller. (I did say ancient, didn't I?)

During the early stages of implementing the system, I would receive calls about perceived problems and issues. One evening I get a call. From the description, it sounds like the printer driver has stopped working. This was of prime importance during second trick as most of their work was hard copy printed reports to large credit card operations.

The conversation goes like this:
Me - Go to the Red, Blue and Grey terminal
Op - OK, I'm there
M - Hold the "Ctrl" key down and hit the "C" key
O - OK
M - What happened
O - I got a funny squiggly thing on the screen
M - OK Type "MCR return"
O - OK
M - What happened
O - Nothing
M - Nothing at all
O - On the bottom all I see is MCR return
M - OK I'll be there in about 30 minutes

I arrive and look at the system monitor and on the bottom line I see,

"MCR return"

The real problem turned out to be a blown hammer fuse which prevented the printer from printing.

[TDHofstetter]

[rrich]

Same job, same software, same operating system and same operators. We had difficulty getting the operators to boot the system. There was a group that could accomplish the task and some that could not.

The instructions were:
Press and hold the "Control Key" and press the "Halt Key".
Press and hold the "Control Key" and press the "Boot Key".

After watching the operators attempt to boot the system and failing we changed the instructions.

Press and hold the "Control Key" and press the "Halt Key".
Clap your hands
Press and hold the "Control Key" and press the "Boot Key".

The look on the operators face when the boot procedure worked was priceless. However management forced us to write the instructions as:

Press and hold the "Control Key" and press the "Halt Key".
Release the "Control Key"
Repress and hold the "Control Key" and press the "Boot Key".

And they say that programmers are anal retentive...

[sawduster]

Press and hold the "Control Key" and press the "Halt Key".
Clap your hands
Press and hold the "Control Key" and press the "Boot Key".

Now that is hilarious!